A Month with TWO Kids!

Yes! Its been exactly a month since my son was born. A month since we welcomed him to this world and our family. A month since he completed the final piece of our little family. It also meant that me and J* are now responsible for two tiny humans. While its not always rainbows and unicorns here, but we are getting there. I will jot down some things that I have learnt in the past month.

1.      The Newborn thing gets easier the second time – Because you know the drill. Although its been more than 6 years since Angel was a new born and I had forgotten a lot of things, I was mentally prepared for what is about to come. I know not to freak out at every tiny noise that he makes. The first time around we just had the theoretical knowledge, this time along with that I also knew the practicalities of it. I remember I was so scared to carry Angel when she was a newborn, now I know that he wont break if I give him his tummy time and he is not as delicate as he looks. I am also thankful to a wonderful book called “The Happiest Baby on the Block”. Recommended for all parents of newborns.

2.      I am a pro at multi tasking – I can now feed the baby, help Angel with her homework, carry out a conversation with J* and keep an eye at the stove all at the same time. It is also apparent from the fact that I took almost 6 months after the birth of Angel to get back to this blog and now I back after a month.

3.       Child birth is hard – No matter what the type of birth is – normal or caesarean, no matter if it’s the first child or the nth, it is no mean feat. Especially the first few days. You are leaking from everywhere and the everything is painful. Post partum blues are real and your hormones are having a party at your expense. I realized that breastfeeding is so exhausting, especially during growth spurts and its okay to hug your partner and cry it out because there is light at the end of the tunnel, it gets better, eventually.

4.      My first born needs time to adjust to my second born – Although Angel is six and is very mature for her age and we prepared her during the pregnancy and she did not say it in words and would steal hugs from the little one from time to time, we could feel it. We empathized with her as well, you don’t realize the enormity of the situation until it hits you. Until now she was the center of our world and now another human is in picture who is taking a lot of my time which used to be hers. We involve her with everything related to the baby, from feeding to diaper changes and even doctor appointments. She loves to know what is going on with her baby brother. We also try to make it up to her by spending one on one time with her, especially J*. He takes her with him for mundane things like grocery shopping and they talk and she loves it. I have taken 2 trips with only her and the baby at home to a café and to a store to shop for a present for her friend’s birthday. We also did something for the month of February as it’s the month of love, we basically gave her 14 reasons why we love her, one for each day until Valentine’s Day and it went on the door of her room. She used to eagerly wait for her heart of the day and on weekends would remind me to put one for that day!

5.      It still takes a village to raise a child – You need help and don’t hesitate to ask for help. We have been lucky that my MIL is here to help us for the initial few months and it has been such a huge relief. It means that even though I am not there for Angel’s meal times sometimes, she is with someone who loves her. It also means that I don’t have to worry about laying the meals on the table and I can focus on the baby.

6.      My heart has grown – A cliché, I know. But I had serious thoughts on weather I would be able to love the little one as much as I love Angel, turns out all my worries have been futile as my heart has expanded to accommodate that much more love. Parents are wired that way!

Life with two kids is hard. It is also my new normal. I know its going to be challenging and not everyday is going to end with a smile. It also means that the Valentine Day outing is a late night trip to a café after the kids have gone to bed. However, its worth it!

PS – As you know by now that I call my daughter “Angel” on this blog, though its not her real name, I am still thinking what I should call the little one in this space. Suggestions welcome 😊